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Saturday, February 19, 2005

Ghost busters

Its quiet hot in here, my brother-in-law Bil suddenly announced.
Yeah I know, I said wiping my forehead with my palm.
We are dead tonight. Bil.

I vacated my apartment in Hyderabad and I am still in a look outmode.
On my sister Sim's inviation I agreed to stay with them in the tween.

Lets sleep upstairs on the top tonight. Bil Said.
Who is going to carry the mats, blankets, pillows and bedsheets?
Who is going to bring them down in the morning. You never help me.
I am not coming. Sim announced. Besides, Smiley is been running a
running nose. I dont want him to sleep outdoors. She added.

That statement hurt two egos.

I will carry everything. I will even spread the blankets and makebeds for you. Bil said.
What cold? What mist? You think some mist is gonna do some harm to me?
Give me a break. I said.

Cut to:

Bil and I marveled all the stars and the shining moon in the sky. We lectured
Sim that we have been missing nature by staying inside our little concrete rooms.

Mosquitoes? Sim.
Mosquitoes? With this kind of breeze they dont have a chance. Besides they
are so used to looking out for humans inside their homes. They are not smart
enough to come upstairs. Bil.
Mosquitoes? They are part of nature. You have to accept them.I dont know
about you but mosquito bites never hurt me.Smiley.

Dust and pollution? Sim. (The building is adorned on three of its sides with
roads with full traffic).
Dust? What do you think? You think we breath different air when we stay
inside the house? Its the same air. Actually I read somewhere (which means
he is faking it) that the air inside our house is more polluted with all the dead
skin cells and stuff. Bil.
Dust? Thats your reality. Accept it. Surrender yourself to your reality and your
consciousness will break free. Besides I like inhaling dust filled air.Smiley.

Rain? Sim.
Rain? Ha! Smiley how did I ever marry this dumb chick? Sim, dont you watch
TV? There is no rain for the next few years. There is something called 'Nil Eno'.
Thats the new weather trend. It basically means 'No rain' in Spanish. Bil.
And Smiley, you dont have to answer this question. Bil.
Aye Bil.Smiley.

Nature Calls? Sim.
Bah. Bil.
Boo. Smiley.

Robbery and break ins? Sim.
Boo. Bil.
Bah. Smiley.

Sim tossed around for a while and finally couldnt stand and left.
Women! Smiley.
Yeah. They live in their comfort zones. Cant experiment. Cant differentiate.Dumb. Bil.
Sim handed over her rug to Bil before leaving. You might need it. It gets real cold in the middle of night.
I dont need it. Bil.
I dont need it either. I dont know about you but I like it when its cold and when its moist.Smiley.

With in a few minutes a long cold breeze passed over us. We were tickled with delight.
Silly Sim. Never had it in her Karma. Bil.
We sighed in relief.

A drizzle of fine sand passed over us a minute later.
Achhoo. Achhoo. Thoo thoo. Thptrrr. Thptrrr.
What the fuck was that?
Yeah, fuck it.
We got up and made our beds again.

Then I slept. In the middle of the night, When I woke up Bil was looking into my face.
Did you by any chance bring a water bottle with you?
No.Didnt Sim?

Then I slept. When I woke up Bil was pacing around.
The moon. The moon. Its in my face. Its shining through.
We got up and threw the pillows onto the opposite side of the mat.

Then I slept. When I woke up Bil was killing mosquitoes.
Lucky you. You covered yourself with that blanket. I cant sleep with a blanket
covering my face.
They will go away, just wait for the breeze.By then it was considerably cool and
my nose was blocked.

Then I slipped into a dreamland. When I woke up four mosquitoes were
sucking blood from my forehead and Bil was giving taeKwando kicks to some
invisible ones.

Then I slipped into a dreamland and had a dream. I was hiding inside a big
refrigerator. A monster was waiting patiently outside. All Iwanted to do was pee.

When I woke up Bil looked like a shivering ghost. The other side of my blanked
was close to wet. The bed was ice cold.

We are dead tonight.
Yeah I know.

Cut to:

Knock, Knock.

Sim, like she knew it, was sleeping in the hall, without even opening her eyes,
just opened the door for us walked back to her bed.

We were concerned you would be scared. Bil.
Yeah, you can feel safe now. We are back. Smiley.

Bil, I kept a water bottle for you, right next to your bed.
Smiley, ...and 'dont flush'. The commode is still under repair.
Good night. She added.

On that night, two, big, hairy chested men did exactly as they were told,
retired to their beds holding on to their favourite pillow and secretly
admired silly Sim.

5 comments:

Leela said...

You're so predictable Smiley. After the first few lines, I knew exactly how this was going to turn out.

Leela said...

Btw, something weird happens to your site in Firefox.

:-) said...

I hope atleast you enjoyed reading it. ;-) Btw, how you doing baby. Throw us a Dubai post.

:-) said...

Leela : i am not very good with html. The thing is I stole this template. Long back. Back then there was no fox that was on fire.

Yeah...ironically I use firefox and cant view my blog properly.

You are welcome to my place, to stay late and fix it. You can always stay back if it gets really late.

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