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Sunday, February 05, 2006

Smiley meets Ram Gopal Varma

It was Saturday afternoon. No one was at my office except Zee, Shredder and I.
Zee was lazying in the sofa and I was playing dead with Shredder.
Zee suddenly asked
What are your plans for the evening?
Dunno. If you are staying back, I will have couple of drinks and go home. Else, I will
go home straight and sober.
There is a cocktail dinner at Taj Krishna. You want to join?
No. No way.

The day before I bought a key chain with glowing LEDs. I was showing it to
Shredder and then hiding it. He gets frustrated pretty fast when he is losing.
So he was begging me to show that zing zing thing to him.

Zee said, Hey Ravi just called. I need to go to the party.
Who is Ravi?
Ravi Teja.
Why is Ravi Teja attending this party?
You are crazy or what? It is his party. Its got something to do with his latest
movie Shock. Ram Gopal Varma will be there too.
Gee Zee. Can I join?
Sure you can. But you need to take a bath. Lately you smell like a dog.

In the shower I suspected that Jyothika might attend the party too and did my
Smileys Quick Fix Ab exercise (Just in case). I wore jeans, Calvin Klein T and my
new shiny metal Espirit watch. (I wrote the previous sentence just to tell you about
my new watch. It rocks. My friend loveAll gifted that watch to me two weeks back).

On our way we picked Dagger and reached Taj.
It turned out to be an audio function with cocktails and dinner later.

This sucks man. An audio function? Dagger got frustrated.

There were the usuals. Puri Jagannath, Raghavendra Rao, Suresh babu, Rajamouli
etc. But nothing prepared me for the arrival of Ram Gopal Varma. There was certain
uneasiness till then. With Ramu’s arrival the whole auditorium got charged up. He
was mobbed by the press and everyone from Tollywood wanted to shake his hands
and to get a picture with him. There is an enigmatic energy surrounding him. He was
charismatic in his own way and knew his way through.

Audio function was over in a swift fifteen minutes. Everyone mobbed the bar
counter.There are always three kinds of people in this type of parties.


Zee and I managed drinks and some quick snacks. We secured a comfortable
area to stand too. Dagger, Kyonki and Rocky joined us. Soon Ravi Teja joined us.
(Dagger, Zee and Kyonki are good friends of Ravi Teja, the hero of the film).

Ravi is energy personified. There is no difference off screen. My eyes were rather
fixed on an itemNumberBomb. She did a number in the film. There was another
beautiful female who was a little on the plump side in a bright red saree. She was
sexy. She was also shy. Clearly not from the industry.

A lot of young girls were taking pics with Ravi and his autographs. Bomb was
with an oldie. There were going everywhere together.

I wonder how much bomb charges for a night.
30-50k. But she must have been already booked. Dagger came in handy.

By the time I finished my second Bacardi rest of the dudes finished four. Most of the
folks finished their dinner and left. We got a little high. I spotted this dude Jeeva.
(Chandraswamy in the movie Sarkar).

Zee, lets talk to Jeeva.
Jeeva was gulping whisky. I walked to Jeeva and shook his hands.
We want to talk to you. As a matter of fact, we would be cool if you join us.
Jeeva joined us. Zee started.

You wont believe what I am going to say.
Jeeva looked curious and puzzled at the same time.
Whatever I am going to say is going to come from my heart. Not from my mouth.
Say it.

Zee is a fan of yours. I lied.
Zee thumped his chest and then placed his hand on Jeevas shoulder.
Eyes. Your eyes man. Your eyes. Zee remained silent after that.

Thats all Zee wanted to say. I helped Jeeva out of his open mouth.
You know what is the thing that we remember about the movie Sarkar?
You know what is the first thing that strikes whenever someone mentions
Krishna Vamsi?
You know a villain who can do comedy as well as a rape?
Don’t know.

Dagger loved what was happening. He joined. My grandma used to tell me that
artists are Gods children and rest of us is adopted. Your life is blessed.

Jeeva got fully charged up. He started talking about divinity in acting and how his
job of acting is his puja to the God.

Sir, long time back I saw an illegal clipping of a Malayalam movie. It was a clip of
you raping a girl in a hotel room. It looked so original. I asked.

Jeeva gave me a Chandraswamy look.

Meanwhile Ramu walked by. A girl who looked like just out of her teens was waiting
to meet him. I was observing that girl. One of Telugu artists spoke to her at length
before that.

Meanwhile Zee caught Lawrence. (Composer of Chiranjeevi’s famous Veena step,
Director of Mass and Style).

You wont believe what I am going to say.
Because whatever I am going to say is going to come out of my heart.
Not from my mouth.

Lawrence looked at me for rescue. I winked.

Zee thumped his chest. I am fan of Chiranjeevi. I saw your film.
You are a fan of Chiranjeevi too. We are brothers.

Meanwhile Ramu was getting physical with the girl. He put his hand around her
shoulder. Another Telugu star (Cant disclose the name) approached the girl and
whispered something in her ear. She looked a little nervous and not really into it.

I just couldnt stand it anymore. I walked to Ramu and looked into his eyes and said,

Hi Ramu, I am Smiley. I love your films. I am so glad I met you in person. Then I
looked at the girl and winked at her. She looked at Ramu. I shook Ramu’s hands.
He just said, Thanks. He was oozing power that was intimidating. I walked back.

Zee and Dagger were explaining Gist about how they have got rights to a dinner
with Shah Rukh Khan and wondering how to cash it. Gist was assuring them that
if they can pull Preity Zinta he can sell it out.

The girl was wearing a sleeveless. Her skin still has the radiance of a girl and her
chin is still filled with baby fat. Ramus seasoned hand on that shoulder, sucking
her into the matrix, looked like a metaphor to me.

Bomb left. Red saree left. Teenage girls were going gung ho taking pictures
with starts.

Its going to be a long night. I thought. I waved my hand for an extra drink.


Twilight Fairy said...

sounds like a scene from Page 3.

When are you directing Page 1?

:-) said...

Inshah allah, pretty soon.

GratisGab said...

LOL! Do they really don't get that you are taking their trip?

anantha said...

* is reminded of the time when he fooled a classmate into believing that Thalaivar and him were related and that thalaivar would be visiting soon...chuckles at the memory..

Adi said...

what da fuck dude ... u be attending page 3 parties now eh? tch tch ..

saale, when i was there , where were these parties then *kicks smiley's butt*

Anonymous said...

smiley, when u are doing the page 1 dont forget hire me. i can multitask-script, direction, lightgirl whatever


:-) said...

Grabby: Surprisingly they dont. These fellas, they are so insecure all the time.

anti: The mighty thalaivar himself? ayyyaaayyaai.

adi: Its never late buddy. (guards butt)

nonicky: sure girl. :-)

anantha said...

*suddenly is reminded of another instance when waiting for the arrival of Charminar Express at Central Station in Chennai, he met this Gult actor (chandra mohan, he thinks) from the 70s who "ordered" him to get a trolley for his wife's luggage. Poor aNTi had to do it at the age of 10, since his uncle was hard of hearing and could not hear anything that this gult dude was telling him. Feels his blood boil now..

Prerona said...

btw, u've been tagged ...

:-) said...

anti: Please dont tell me that you carried Chandramohan's luggage. (ROTFL)

prerona: Tagged? Where? When? How? Who?