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Saturday, April 24, 2004

Aqua Devils Association-Ek
Humiliating the hosts

Round 1

This place sucks. There is no Smirnoff in the bar. They don't have ice cubes.
AC doesn't run. Chilly chicken is too chillyish. Its too humid. I am sweating.
Basically you guys and your this little frigging town suck.

The guy who introduced me to this big belly group adjusted himself uneasily in his
three legged chair.

Is there anything that you can boast of? What do you guys do for entertainment,
I mean, apart from drinking and raping your wives?

Round 2

You call this service? So, this is your hippest joint? So this is it?
I can have more fun with my mobile phone.

Round 3

You rotten stinking suckers. What else, apart from this? Entertain me. Throw me stuff.
Show me something cool.

One of them, barely audible said, " We have an association."

Association. Ha ha ha. Now you are making me laugh. Wait! You are making me puke.
What kind of association?

"Aqua Devils Association".

Devils! Hmm….what do you guys do?

"We get together in the morning. Some people play shuttle. Others swim."

You formed an association to do this? Why devils?

"Because we can do lot of stunts while swimming."

I looked at their bellies. I doubted their abilities.

Huh. What "stunt" do you guys do? Drown? You guys must be the left overs of the
Ha ha ha.

"No sir. We can do this. We can do that. We can …".

Cut the crap. Ok, let me beat the shit out of you guys. Lets settle this score
once for all. I am in. I am joining you guys for a swim tomorrow. Morning sharp six.
By the way, where is the pool?

The next day morning.

It wasn't a pool. It was river Krishna. Calm and serene. Vast and wild.

Devils quickly jumped in. I looked around. Stretched my arms. Calmly took off my
pants and shirt. Wore my shorts. I couldn't see the other side of the river. On
my right side, the river looked like it ended into hills. On my left it disappeared
into fog.

The water was surprisingly clear and warm. I did couple of warm up strokes.
(All this to scare them off).

Ok, what do we do now?

Lets attend the meeting first.

Meeting? But everyone already jumped in.

Yeah! (Duh). Meeting is in the middle of the river.

I tried to appear cool. I casually looked at the horizon. At any discounted
distance the middle of the river looked like atleast 500 to 1000 meters from where
we were. The max stretch I did in my whole f$#%ing life was three continuous stokes
from one end to the other end at Bangalore corporation pool.

Sounds like fun. Lets go.

to be continued...

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